In this post: For being some of the most service-oriented people I know, it’s surprising that most health coaches struggle with the fear of being too selfish…
Feel relatable at all?
You might hesitate to charge for coaching if you think someone can’t afford it because of...fear of being selfish
You might feel guilty about quitting your job to work for yourself right now when so many have lost their jobs because of...fear of being selfish
What’s at the root of this fear, really? Why is it selfish to choose a new career path that allows you the freedom to work for yourself while being of service to others?
And where are we conflating caring for ourselves and our right to live a life we love with selfishness? Who really benefits from any one individual choosing to struggle as their life path?
I think it’s time we had an honest conversation about this as health coaches...
3 Money Mindset and Wealth Consciousness Fears Health Coaches Need to Face
Hello, beauties! How are you all? I've been reading all of the posts in our Facebook group and getting connected on some amazing things that we are up to in our community. And I've been coaching in UPswing Mastermind this morning and prepared a topic that I felt I have to share with you all.
Health coaches are some of the most heart-centred service-oriented people. I know. So why is it then that so many health coaches struggle with the fear of being too selfish? I don't know if this is something that you can relate to.
It's something that I have witnessed from coaching hundreds of health coaches over the years, this fear of being too selfish. Here are some examples of how this might show up.
You might hesitate to charge for coaching if you think someone can't afford it.
You might feel guilty about quitting your job to work for yourself right now when so many others have lost their jobs.
You might never offer your services because you think it's not the right time. No one's focused on investing in their health. Who are you to ask right now?
This is all because of fear of being selfish. So what's at the root of this fear of selfishness, really? Why does it feel selfish to choose a new career path that allows you the freedom to work for yourself or be of service to others? Why do we constantly feel conflicted in caring for ourselves and our right to live a life that we love? Why do we equate that with selfishness and who benefits from any one of us individuals choosing to struggle in our life path? Who benefits when we struggle with this feeling of selfishness? I think it's time that we had an honest conversation about this is health coaches.
I do think it's such an important topic. And it seems to have been part of the health coaching community. It's part of its fabric. So what's at the root of this. What do you think is at the root of this? Let's go through some of the examples mentioned.
Fear of charging for your services
So first off, fear of charging for your services because you think it's selfish to ask for money right now. This one I'm finding is prevalent and it is such a toxic thought to any new business. Let's get it out of the way right now, this one brings up the question of why are we assuming to know anything about anyone else's finance? Why aren't we devaluing our services and not expecting anyone else to do the same? Why don't we do these things? Why don't we put our hands in other people's pockets and decide, "Oh, they shouldn't be spending right now or they don't want to spend right now."
If you look around, there are many, many businesses still operating and many have had to pivot and shift and change the way that they offer their services so that they can offer a more virtual environment. So people continue to be patrons of their businesses. And there was never an exception that they shut down because people think they're selfish to be in business.
Most businesses have gone online, realize that doing that to not be selfish, it's quite the opposite actually. And I've seen more concern expressed that all these businesses, that people love and shop at, all of these practitioners, that they love to hire will not be there anymore. People are upset when they come by. People are upset when people are not going online. And there's more fear from people that services could go away. More people are showing concern that the businesses, the people that they love to hire will not be around anymore because everything that has taken place has affected many businesses.
So my question is, why are you assuming your business as a health coach is not highly valued in the way that these other businesses and other practitioners are?
Can you allow yourself to shift into the possibility that what you offer is so important right now? It matters. And there are so many people right now looking for the kinds of solutions that you offer and they're not expecting you to do it for free. People want to invest in their health. People want to invest in moving forward in their lives. People want to invest in learning how to be stress-free or deal with overwhelm. People want to wake up and invest in things that have not been working for them. So this is important that we open our doors and have our services available to those who are looking for them.
Fear of quitting your job to work for yourself
Let's look at example number two then, the fear of being selfish because of wanting to quit your job or cut back on hours to grow your business. When many others have lost their jobs, maybe you feel you should just be grateful, put up with the job that you're in, even though it's not serving you. Now, this one is an interesting one. When we really think about it, how many people concern themselves with what you do for a living? Who is the most affected by your decision? This is your decision. Now, if you have a family and of course, your family is affected by the decisions that you make. They'll probably impact everyone financially, especially if your financial contribution plays an important role. And so the only people whose opinion should matter in this way are those who are part of your family and affected by your decisions.
However, a lot of health coaches are casting a pretty wide net of concern and thinking everybody is judging them for wanting to create a business that works for them, a lifestyle of freedom, doing what they want, working fewer hours, having more time for your own life, charging decent rates for your services, creating spaciousness in your own schedule, time for your own self-care, time for your own healing, honouring that job is not working for your body if it's burning you out or spending hours in traffic. A lot of things recently have made us realize what's important. And that working for ourselves, for many of us, is so much more in line and alignment. And that is no one else's business.
There's this fear that people will judge you and think you're selfish for not choosing to suffer. Like you should be suffering in the job and be grateful for the job. And you know that you should be wanting to work hard or stick with a job that drains you. This belief that work means sacrifice and that making money has to come by working hard has to come at a cost to you. We learn a lot about what it means to make money, have a career from our upbringing. And these mindsets and beliefs are starting to get in our way.
So let me tell you some truths. The question is whose business is it? What do you do? Are you letting other people's opinions or potential opinions run your life? Are you consulting the right people in making the decision to work for yourself? And top of that list is you, are you asking your heart? Are you actually willing to hear your own truth? Have you done that? Have you checked in and asked in a quiet space? Is it right for me to be stepping into service now and growing my business? Check any assumptions that you hold inside you that are against your right to pursue a career of your dreams.
When we were kids, we were encouraged to think about dream jobs, right? When you were a kid, how many adults ask "What do you want to be when you grow up?" So how is it now unwelcome or selfish to be a grown-up deciding what you really want to do, and then pursuing that?
Can you challenge that belief in yourself that it's selfish to pursue your dream career? I'd love to hear any thoughts that you have on this.
Fear of being selfish for offering your services
Third and final example: the fear of being selfish for offering your services because you think it's not quite the right time now, and no one's focused on investing in their health right now. This is similar to the first fear, except it brings up not being willing to even put ourselves out there, not letting people know that we even have health coaching services to offer. Making assumptions about other people that they don't value that health or food-related challenges or mindset or whatever coaching modality.
You are making the assumption that other people don't care about that right now and it is not your place to judge them.
You might feel guilty or awkward talking about food and nutrition, healthy habits right now when people are struggling. But this comes down to the perspective of, "Are you willing to show up and serve for what people need?"
The thing is more people right now are waking up to habits that no longer support them. I'm seeing it in my paid groups over and over again and the different clients that are coming to them. People are becoming more aware of how they feel and what they no longer want in their lives. People are spending more time at home, more time looking for at-home recipes, at-home workouts and self-care routines. People's lives, amidst everything that's going on, have got simpler, even though it might not feel like that with kids at home and working from home, et cetera.
The interest in immunity has gone up, interest in holistic health is increasing. People are placing more value on how they take care of themselves as ways to cope with how they're feeling about the world. Self-sacrifice is not a way to be of service. We have to be willing to model what it means to take care of ourselves, to fill out cups before we put anyone else, everyone else, and everyone else's judges and thoughts and opinions before us.
You know the saying, "Put on your life jacket first." If you are out, if you're over-resourced, you can't provide the best coaching possible.
And you are here to be a leader of this work, not to hide it. You are meant to get this health coaching work out in the world. The need has increased and there was no room for us to play small and feel selfish. It's time to commit, to being a beginner, being willing to get in the game and growing your health coaching business because everybody is needing these new ways and we have tools and gifts to support them.
So let me know what you think of these examples of how fear of being selfish shows up for health coaches. Did any of these resonate with you the most? What do you think is most noteworthy?
If you are ready to think about putting your services out there, overcoming these, what can feel like awkward money conversations, putting together your coaching package, really ready to start pulling your offering together, I offer one of my training called the Purposeful Packages Challenge. It's free, full, premium training on how to create your purposeful package.
I hope this post has been helpful for you. Have a beautiful week. You are not selfish. You are here to serve, take care.
Love,
Amanda xx
PS. Ready to create a purposeful package in your coaching business - and learn how to charge in a way that gets clients booked in with ease? Click this link to get instant access to the FREE training >> https://training.amandajdaley.com/packages
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